When Overload arrives, what are we to do? Yes, it might suddenly appear, or it might be the result of a cumulative build up. Either way, how are we to manage the sensory bombardment? How are we to navigate the effect of it (from now on referred to as ‘him’ because I’m going to personify him) on our thinking? How do we deal with the impact of him (the overload) on our behaviours and responses to all that is around us? As ever, I do not believe there is a single solution. But I do have a few things that sometimes work for me when it happens.
Recognise him.
Overload is either approaching or has landed and unless you’ve inadvertently jumped straight to meltdown, it is better for you if you’re aware he’s there. By noticing him and sensing him and being aware of him, you then have a starting point of how to manage him as best you can at the time with what you are able to manage at the time.
Give yourself some space.
Can you? If so, fabulous. Get yourself away from the context where the overload was initiated and do whatever is best for you to reset. For some, sitting alone, in whatever position, in silence or with pre-planned/available sounds from familiar songs/books/white noise/whatever. For some, rocking a little (or a lot). For some, engaging in a focussed activity that has previously helped you to reset. For some, there is stimming (and you will already know what works for you).
You can’t remove yourself from the situation?
Then breathe. Step away from anyone talking at you even if it might seem rude. Get yourself to a location where you have as much room around you as is possible in the context. Find some airflow in the environment, if you can. Focus on the physical responses to the overload and try (as you breathe as slowly and deeply as you can) to quieten them in your mind. It sounds weird. I know that. It might not work for you. True. Sometimes, it works for me and for that reason I mention it here.
At other times, I can regroup myself to cover the temporary scenario and somehow place myself into ‘role’. When I do that, it is less about ‘me’ and what I am experiencing in the time and place and is more about how I will navigate it as I focus on whatever else (or whoever else) is outside of me. In role, I can cope with far more than I can out of role.
What if the head noise is way too loud to regain any amount of control?
If you have anyone with you who knows you, ask them to help you get out of the situation before any meltdown potentially approaches. Find a way out as self-protection, however you need to do that. You are concerned that people might not understand? No, possibly not. But so be it. No need for them to ‘get it’ as it isn’t them who is living it.
You need a bit more help than that?
That’s okay. Ear plugs? Use them. Headphones/earbuds? Use them. Sunglasses? Wear them. Change your clothes to ensure you’re wearing soft cotton (I won’t ask why you weren’t already doing that). As a temporary coping strategy, use whatever you need to.
Overload isn’t always around. Oh, he might be a frequent visitor during different seasons of life, yes. He is likely to turn up uninvited. He isn’t welcome, no. However, every single time that you find a new way to manage, cope with and get through the experience when Overload is very present, you have taken another step towards empowering yourself ready for next time he turns up. We can remember each strategy that works for us at any given time. We have that to draw on at other times. We can build on successes. And we will, if we choose to.
Some will tell you we need to avoid the situations where Overload is likely to be. Maybe there are times when that is wise. But too much avoidance will increase our sensitivities, and we will instead find ourselves face to face with Overload in scenarios we maybe previously managed relatively easily. Maybe it’s about a healthy balance of exposure and protection; of facing and avoiding when necessary; of making the best decisions we can at any given time about what we can or cannot manage. This will likely work well if we remember that oftentimes, we can cope with far more than we think. Yes, we fear the fallout and inevitably there will be fallout. But we have ways of navigating all that is real in life even if Overload shows up. And we will keep finding new ways of living, surviving and maybe even thriving, if we keep looking for them and exploring them for ourselves.
